day one. how many day ones do we have in life? quite a few, i'd say. today is the first day of classes, and man, i'm overwhelmed. i held in tears all the way to school, and i'm holding them in now. i'm terrified. i'm scared i'll be disliked because i'm a total social dud, and i'm scared of failing.
of course, it takes time to settle into everything, and of course, i can't knock it until i try it, but with everything that has been going on right now, i just can't handle school. i just want to go home, and crawl into the safety of my bed. i can't handle the stress of starting new. starting in a place where i have no friends. i'm terrified, and i feel like a child, crying to go home. i'm also 2 hours early for class, which is just keener kelly of me, but i can't stand being at home, sulking over danny. i'm desperately trying to move on, and desperately trying to be my happy self. but it's so hard. i can't do anything without him constantly on my mind. pathetic, isn't it? i know.
well, i guess i'll keep you guys all posted after class... right now, i'm going to follow jessi's advice, and to do something that scares me: telling danny exactly how i feel.
it's just a pathetic day overall for me, i know. but i can't handle this anymore, and i just want to go home.
xo, yona.
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